My niece sent me this TikTok video to share some wisdom with me. It showed a crowd of men in India staring at this beautiful, regal woman. She looks at the camera and proclaims that no good comes from trying to protect women because it creates this male behavior that lusts after women’s bodies. I’m putting my own spin on what she said, but that was the message. She also said “teach men how to behave and how to respect women.” I had to give the praise hands emoji back to my niece because this is TRUTH!!
When will the World get it? Maybe when we stop drinking the misogynistic kool-aid. I feel isolated when I talk about the dangers of men drunk with power. Women in my own family feel no shame in expressing their lack of trust in women and unquestioned support of men. In a way that feels like a betrayal and attack against every woman, including myself.
Some argue that today’s accusations of abuse and harassment are destroying young mens lives. Surely we can acknowledge the countless women who have been torn apart by men’s accusations. This is not tit for tat, or eye for an eye kind of karma, but a fate that a lot of women have already experienced. Around the world there are fatal consequences for not being what society or your family thinks you should be as a girl. A woman faces blame, exile, or death for surviving an assault. She is forced to carry the shame and survive the trauma alone.
All women have experienced, in some form, being told they should be something other than what they are. Whether it be something big like who to marry, or something so trivial as what shade of lipstick to wear. There is never a clear picture or example of a woman who gets it right. Just a barrage of comments and suggestions of how she should be different than what she is.
As sisters, we have much work to do. Alongside with our conscious brothers. TOGETHER. My rights and freedoms mean nothing if women around the world do not have the same. The strong women responsible for raising me were not formally educated beyond eighth grade. To that point, the men in my life did not have degrees or diplomas in some cases. I never thought much about the value of education until I fell short from graduating college myself. At that time I felt that work experience would serve me better as I made a career for myself. My intention then was more about material goals than purpose driven work. Now, wholeheartedly, I believe education is the passport to opportunities and advancements in all areas of life. Not just for the individual but for the world as a whole. We need to passionately advocate for better education for our daughters and our sons so that we may live in a world where fair gender collaboration is revered.
The majority of domestic workers are women. These are roles that serve to help others achieve their highest potential, yet these women are often overlooked and underpaid. They have no benefits, no sick leave, no insurance. They serve unconditionally for the families they work for, while their own families have to manage in their absence. No one should have to give so selflessly all their lives. The seasons of womanhood need to be supported with policy and legislation to guarantee all women opportunities and education.
So much of the vitriol for women is built into the foundation of the world we live in. In modern times we still question women’s motives and intentions when speaking out. How does she benefit from revealing this truth or speaking to power? How dare she? She’s calculating and manipulative? There is no end to the insults and injury that is perpetuated against women. Even with the bitter climb, women continue to reach for the top summit. Examples of this are Alexandria Ocasio Cortez speaking to congress about a male colleague calling her out of her name. The Duchess of Sussex speaking out about her personal struggles in the Royal Family and the UK. Marianne Williamson running for President and using her voice to invoke a mutiny in the heart of America. Jackie Letaru who is demanding better in Uganda through being a leader in her classroom and community. Ai-jen Poo, a dedicated activist working to bring dignity and fairness to domestic workers. Nadya Okamoto, breaking the silence about periods, the menstrual movement! Helena Gualinga, an Indigenous activist fighting against big oil companies who threaten Mother Earth. Malala Yousafzai, a hero and leader for girls education. There are so many girls and women taking risks and speaking out. If only we all can be so brave to listen to them and act with courage. Together incite a revolution that brings the change they seek and the change we all need.
You can find out more about the missions of the Amazing Women mentioned in this post here:
Malala Fund, Nadya, Helena, Jackie, AOC, Marianne, Meghan, Ai-jen
This post is dedicated to my young nieces Rachel Sue and Sophia Camille. Be Illuminators and Shine Bright.