Come over! I could hear my brother and all his friends shouting over the phone. "Alright, I’ll walk down".

Going to Shaun’s was just down the street and I expected the usual knucklehead behavior. Teenage boys shooting pool and parading around the house like it was theirs. I found a spot on the couch when all of a sudden a guy jumped over the back and slid in behind me, equivalent  today as sliding into someone's DM’s. I was surprised, a little shocked, but intrigued. Who was this guy? 

It was Mo. He had become fast friends with the guys I had grown up with. Funny with a lot of personality. He had his ears pierced and tag line. You see Mo had the nickname Saber T which referred to the saber tooth cat. He had a tooth that stuck out as a result of not losing the one underneath. To combat the relentless heckling he would growl and say, “I’ll bite ya.” No one really noticed us laying on the couch together but for those few minutes it just felt right. There was a no dating black guys policy that my family and world suggested but that would soon be non-existent. 

It wasn’t until a couple weeks later that we seen each other again. Nothing really happened until Mo called me. We started talking and then we went to a concert with a group of friends. My brother noticed a mild flirtation but didn’t express any disapproval. When I joined the same group of friends to see Fast and Furious (the first of infinity) Mo and I sat by each other. I had butterflies. A scene in the movie where the character Mia states she doesn't date her brothers friends got a huge reaction from the group we were with. It was all laughs and jokes, but I ignored the implied message. 

My senior prom was no different than any of the other crazy high school dances. We were a bunch of privileged suburban kids about the set off in an R.V. with a keg. After the dance we all had reservations at a nearby hotel to keep the party going.  I was pretty over the whole scene at that point, but I was never a person to turn down a night of dancing. A lot of the parents wanted me to assure them that I was going to be present at the hotel. I guess they felt they could trust me to be more like the adult in the group. At the end of the night Shaun and Mo crashed in my room. (The three of us would end up crashing together again the night before our wedding, but that's another story.)

At this point I was finishing up my first year at JC. He was a senior in high school and we had secretly connected through late night phone calls, visits to my apartment and listening to old school sunday night radio.

Our secret courtship was on and off.

When I really fell in love with Mo was when he rescued me. Legit rescued me. I had kept in contact with this guy who spent the summer fishing in Alaska. When he got back to Cali, I was hanging out with him and his friend at my apartment. The mood shifted when they said they were going to sleep over. What the hell, I hadn’t even invited them to stay. In a panic, I needed backup. I called Mo. He rolled over in his mama’s van wearing sweats and a beenie. This confident 18 year old ushered these college guys to the car and drove their sorry asses back to school. He then drove me back to my apartment and we fell asleep on the couch. He was sitting up and I was leaning on his shoulder. He never questioned me or judged me. Today I realize that situation could have ended very different for me that night. But Mo was there for me. 

At this time, my favorite place to go was Twins nightclub. On Thursday it was 18 and over. Mo used his brother’s ID to get in and his camaro to drive there. We danced and hugged up on each other. Finally, at the end of the night in the parking lot our long hug turned into our first kiss. I was rocking a chola chic look, he was flashing that smile that still melts my heart. I loved being in his arms. I decided I was ready for my first and I trusted him. Even if we never spoke after that I felt confident in my decision. Empowered that I chose for myself without pressure and thankful that he was down for protection. I always wondered what that moment for him was like. I mean we were kissing and out of nowhere I was like “are you ready?” I was ready for that moment, but not the consequences of my newfound womanhood and liberty.

The summer faded into fall 2001. We both were attending JC and still hush hush about our infatuation. It was all puppy love, but I was starting to really want more with Mo. He invited me to go to a cabin with his family over thanksgiving weekend in Tehachapi. I made the excuse to my family that I was meeting friends and made the long drive to join him. It was the first real introductions to all of his family. It was a crazy weekend with tall tales of ocean underworlds ( uncle bucks near death drowning experience) sibling rivalry (Mo is one of 7), and seeing how far Mo will take a dare ( running naked up a mountain in the snow). The weekend was a bonding trip for me and the family I was getting to know, but it was also the beginning of a deep rift between me and my own family. 

When I got back to school, my brother found me in the parking lot and I could tell in his face he was angry. Rightfully so, I had been lying to keep my relationship with Mo hidden from him and my family. He had found out about the cabin trip and gave me the ultimatum either I was going to tell my parents or he was. I wasn’t prepared to come clean that day but I knew he was serious. I immediately drove to my parents house and put my heart on the table. As the sun was going down my mom made it clear it was either going to be my relationship with Mo or my family. without hesitation, I chose him. 

Fast forward almost two decades later and we have our boys and a united family that loves and supports us. Choosing LOVE was the best thing I could have done in my life and I am thankful we're here together.